My own
by Sorceress aKa Called Death
Summary: What if Cordelia wasn't who she really was. And where is Max when she wakes up?


Series: Absolute Isolation  
Title: My own  
Rating: R  
Email: Sorceress_Wing_Zero@hotmail.com  
Author: Sorceress aKa The One Called Death  
Show: Angel/Dark Angel  
Summery: What if Cordelia wasn't who she really was. C/A and some W/F. Maybe even give Gunn  
a shot with Kendra (I miss her, I'm adding her back in!)  
Spoilers: For Angel, all up until "Billy"; For Dark Angel "SOME ASSEMBLY REQUIRED"  
Authors notes: OK, I had to write this, this story has been in my head for a while now. I am so sorry  
too, but I am going to have to give Logan to that blonde beoutch. I need Max for someone else.  
Website: www.angelfire.com/scifi2/queenofswords  
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
  
  
  
~* Fred's POV *~  
  
Well, everything seems to be normal around here, well as normal as it can be in this  
place. Angel and Cordelia are downstairs training, and Wesley is just been acting strange. I think  
he still feels bad for what happened. I don't know why, it wasn't his fault. The blood he touched   
was bad, and it kinda made anything, expect for vampires as far as I know, with a Y chromazone   
go primal towards women.   
  
And that certainly wasn't his fault, yet he can't forgive himself for, well trying to kill me.   
Gunn had been affected too, but he made me knock him out. Good thing too, I was getting kinda  
scared because of what that guy's blood was doing to them. I wonder if he's feeling any better?  
  
"Hey guys." A cherpy Cordelia said while she came into the small office area. I was   
sitting near the door while Wesley was at the desk, and Gunn was just leaning on the wall.  
  
"Hi. Uh.. how are you?" I gave a smile, for some odd reason I never felt all that cozy  
around when people were this friendly. I'm not used to it, not even before I was sent to that hell  
I was in. I was what all the popular kids called the freak, the nerd and any other names that any  
of they can think of. And knowing that she was one of those popular kids always make me a bit  
uneasy. Although I know she had changed. Wesley told me what she was like then, and I found it  
strange how someone that sounded so heartless could be this woman who was the heart of our  
group. I was half of the brains, Gunn had told me. I think he's right, it's the best thing I can use.  
  
"Ehh, a little tired. I swear one of these days I'm not even gonna be able to move from  
all that training Broody gives." She sat down in the chair across from the desk and looked over to  
Wesley then back to me. "Ok, that's it. What is it with the men here, why must they brood?" She  
turned her attention back to him. "You are spending way to much time around Angel."   
  
He looked up at Cordelia and raised his eyebrow. "And what may I ask does that   
mean?" He tilted his head to the side before Cordelia started talking again.  
  
"It means that all you seem to be . . . why me?" She whimpered as a vision started to   
overtake her body, and soon all of us were at her side. I turned to see that Angel had also heard  
the commotion and ran into the room. Whenever it came to Cordelia he was a second away.  
  
"Ouch, I swear I am going to track down the PTB and I am going to hurt them, badly."  
She took her hands and put her fingers on her temples.  
  
"What did you see?" Wesley asked in a hushed voice, knowing that she didn't like loud  
noises after a vision.   
  
"It wasn't very clear. All I saw were little kids, and somehow I felt as if I knew them, but  
right before the vision this weird sign flashed. Like some old symbol." She grabbed a piece of   
paper and drew what she saw. It was a circle with three loops through it. (think of the Charmed sign)  
  
"Well, maybe if we find out what the symbol means we'll find out more about why you   
had you're visions. Maybe this wasn't a direct vision like you usually get, what if it's like one where  
the PTB showed what happened the week before with Billy." I finished and everyone but   
Cordelia was looking at me. "It could be a possibility, since there were only kids in it, right?"  
  
"I agree." Wesley answered and I saw Gunn and Angel nod their heads. "Gunn do me a  
favor and get Cordy some aspirin. And Fred I'll need your help." He looked over at me, even though  
I could still see the uneasy look in his eyes, he gave a small smile. I smiled back, hopefully maybe   
when we try to figure out what was going on in Cordelia's vision, then maybe I can get Wesley back  
to his old self.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~* Angel's POV *~  
  
I took Cordy with me for her to rest. If anything her visions are just getting worse, and   
there's nothing I can do to stop it. Really it's my fault, if it hadn't been for me she would have never  
of gotten these visions at all. The only thing keeping me ok is the fact is she's ok with it. She may  
get a little pissed off at the PTB, but who wouldn't?  
  
Gunn, Wesley and Fred are looking through books and trying to track down the symbol  
that Cordelia had drew on the piece of paper. I think it's strange that Gunn would help without either  
Fred or Wesley asking. Maybe Fred asked, without saying anything. Wesley is still feeling guilty  
about what happened a couple of weeks ago. I know that feeling, and if anything it's ok to feel that  
when you got these people around.  
  
Cordelia has her eyes closed and in leaning into her hands that are being supported by  
the desk. I move over to her and put my fingers to her temples. She looks startled at first, but then  
she relaxes, she knows that I'd never hurt her, and this has become a thing that happens. She had  
a nasty vision and I rub her head for her. Being 248 can have some perks, you tend to learn things  
if you listen. Angelus was a killer, but he did listen when he heard the right things.  
  
"Mmm, thanks." He mumbles out as she opens her eyes very slowly. She gives a meek   
smile but I know she's still in pain. "I don't understand it, it seemed like they were more of memories  
rather then flash backs, but I never lived what was happening to them." She shook her head as if  
trying to get rid of something she saw or felt.  
  
"What was going on." I leaned in closer, but not to close. I could never handle myself if I   
was to close to her.   
  
"They were . . . fighting. They were . . . no, not fighting but training. A lot of them, and they  
mainly looked the same. Their hair was shaved off and they wore a white top with army pants. And  
the vision was focused around this one child. I'm pretty sure it was a girl. With hurting eyes, and  
this boy was always there to give her comfort. From what I could feel, almost like he was her brother  
and he was hurting too." Her eyes were starting to give a glazed affect on them, she looked about  
as if she would burst into tears any second.  
  
"I'm gonna go see Lorne, maybe you should come and see if he can tell us anything."   
She nodded and I helped her up. Soon we were on our way to see the one person who might be  
able to tell us something.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~* Lorne's POV *~  
  
Ok, table number five is ok. And there we go. I am going to have this place back in top  
shape. I think I'll just get a bigger spell, like one for humans. However I can't get shake off this weird  
feeling. Like something really bad is gonna happen, but not end-of-the-world kind of bad. More like   
the I-can't-believe-this kind. In which can be just as bad.  
  
"Lorne." I heard a female voice call to. Ahh, I figured one of the them would come and see  
me. It's like a big circle. At least I can get to see the princess. That girl can brighten anyone's day.  
Hence the reason I call her princess, not to mention she looks like a goddess. So nice having these  
kind of friends.  
  
"Hey doll. Anything I can do for you?" She gave a small laugh, and she nodded yes.  
  
"Although I'd like for Broody Boy to hurry up and get his behind in here." She took a   
seat at the newly redone bar. "Redoing everything?"  
  
"Yea, I miss my music, and this time I'll make sure humans can't do any harm in here   
either. Better yet I just will let certain humans in here."  
  
"Oh, Ca'mon. Just do the same thing that you did where you make the demons be good.  
And Gunn is still feeling guilty that he couldn't stop them."  
  
"I know, but this is my home, and it was almost gone for good. Not to mention me."  
  
She got up and gave me a hug. Did I tell you how I loved this girl? She's like the little sister  
I always wanted, and the best part was she's human. I just don't get along very well with my own kind.  
  
"Awfully cozy in here." Angel said as he walked in.  
  
Cordy turned around, with an arm around my shoulder. "Yep, maybe we should make it a  
group hug. Then again you're not too big on hugs." She teased, I laughed. Not many people could   
get away with that.  
  
"Ok, now why is it that you have graced me with your beauty." I directed at the girl that was  
standing next to me. And I could feel that Angelcakes was feeling a little jealous. When is he going  
to tell this girl, I mean this can't go on forever! Cordy doesn't even have a clue for what he feels. And  
I think that's the way that he likes it.  
  
"Bad vision. Do I have to sing?" I don't know why these people don't like to sing. And she  
could if she chose the right song. She keeps picking the ones that aren't made for that voice of hers.  
  
"Yes, but something little. How about twinkle twinkle? Seems easy enough for ya sugar."  
  
She nodded and started to sing. Weird, it wasn't a vision. Not by a long shot, and I know  
what that sign is. It was on the book that we used to get into my home world. However the design  
around it I saw in one of the other pages. "Babydoll, that's enough. I know why you're having these."  
  
She looked up and smiled. "Wow, there's a reason I like you so much." Then she gave me  
a quick peck on the cheek.  
  
"Aww, thanks doll. Are you sure I can't tell everyone you're my little sister?" She just   
laughed.  
  
"Well?" Angel asked. He was always such a dark one. Couldn't he just like be happy for  
once? *sigh*  
  
"Ok, that honey was not one of your regular visions. Actually that happened to me. Right  
before I got called into my home world. Seems you're not from here."  
  
"Excuse me? Yes, I am, last time I checked I was born in Sunnyhell." She folded her arms   
across her chest.  
  
"You might think you were, however I did recognize the pattern that was behind the symbol.  
It didn't let you see it. Only made you look at the main tri-sign. The pattern is known for a certain  
demon. He isn't bad, but he can manipulate time. I've come across those who saw what you saw,   
except they did in their dreams. You probably got it in you're vision because the PTB wanted you to  
notice it. Seems you're one of the ones he placed his spell on. The demons name is Mante, and he's  
a Tealun demon. There should be a spell to put you back to how you are. Except what problems you  
have you'll still have. Physically. So in this case you'll still be the seer, except you'll have your memories  
from your other life. It must be important if you got that vision."  
  
They were looking at me in the most weirdest way. "Somehow I understood that." Cordy  
scratched the back and her head and sighed.  
  
"Thanks, lets go and tell the other what we found out."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~* Gunns POV *~  
  
Angel entered the hotel with Cordy still looking a tad bit confused. However he was a little  
bit of that himself. In which that's rare, so which means they found out something from Lorne.  
  
"Hey guys, I hope you found something out. Cause we didn't." Angel looked at me then   
he nodded.  
  
"Yea, however it's more then we thought it would be." He turned to Cordy. "Go get some  
rest. You need it." She was about to argue but then nodded when she saw the look on his face. Ya   
know the one he has that says don't-make-me kinda look.  
  
He sat down and told us what Lorne had told them. Everyone here was a bit dazed to say  
the least.  
  
"Maybe we could hypnotize her. Like how those people do to those who want to know   
about their past lives." I said, and Fred nodded agreeing with me.  
  
"I think it could work, if not we'd have to call someone. The volume that the book would be  
in isn't here. Unless you guys know someone who could help?"   
  
"Giles might. I would like to find out who Cordy was in that other life of hers first."  
  
We went to go and get Cordy. We saw her laying down but with her eye's wide open.  
She looked towards us and smiled.  
  
"We're going to try and find out who you were. . ."  
  
"I know, I heard." She smiled and gestured to the bed. "Well, you guys gonna sit?" Wesley  
sat down on one side and Angel took the other. Fred and myself took the end of the bed near her   
feet. Wesley then started. It took about a little over a couple of minutes but he got her into some   
sort of daze.  
  
"Listen to my voice and only my voice." He stated. "Tell me what is your name."  
  
"Max. 452. Max. 452." She kept repeating.  
  
"Are you female?"   
  
"Yes."  
  
"What do you look like, in detail."  
  
"Take a picture, go away."  
  
"So you're now aware of me?"  
  
"No shit. Where am I?"  
  
"In a friendly place. What's the last thing you remember?"  
  
"Zach. Oh god, where is he?"  
  
"Who's he?"  
  
"My brother, where is he? It's my fault."  
  
"Nothing is your fault, what happened."  
  
"He didn't remember me, those bastards did something to him. They won't leave us alone.  
All we want is to be left alone."  
  
"Who won't?"  
  
"Those who worked for Manticore, for those who made us."  
  
"Made you?"  
  
"Yes, we're not human."  
  
We all looked at each other. Not human? And she was made?  
  
"Please help me! I need to get to my family, Tinga's son is in danger! Please!" She   
screamed then came out of the influence that Wesley had on her.  
  
"That was interesting."  
  
"What did you guys find out?" Cordy asked as she rubbed her head.  
  
"You mean you didn't remember anything you said?" Angel asked.  
  
"Nada, nothing. Just the a feeling of being lonely, guilty, scared, and mad all at the same   
time. Is that even possible?" She shook her head and hugged her arms around herself. "I feel as if  
I'm missing something big, and I don't know what it is, I just want it back."  
  
"We're going to Sunnydale, Wesley call Giles and Willow and tell them we need their help."  
Wesley nodded then walked into the other room.  
  
"So I finally get to meet these 'scoobies'?" Cordy half laughed and half frowned.  
  
"Yep. And I swear Gunn, Angel . . . if either of you leave me alone for more then five   
seconds I am going to make both of you're lives living hell."  
  
"I promise, just don't leave me either. Especially around Xander, he thinks I need to be a   
pile of dust."  
  
"Fine, Gunn you make sure he keeps his promise." She added with a wink.  
  
That there just made me and Angel laugh.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~* Willow's POV *~  
  
Whoa, I can't believe this. Angel, Cordelia and Wesley are coming here. Giles already has  
the spell ready. Although they should be here soon. We wouldn't tell the others, it might make things  
a little messy. Only me, Tara and Giles know that they're coming.  
  
Spike and Dawn are playing a game of rummy and Buffy is sitting down with Xander. And  
of course Anya is looking at the money and smiling.  
  
We heard the jingle of the door and we looked up to see a girl and a guy. I scrunched my  
face, I didn't know who these people were.  
  
"Uh, is Giles here?" The girl asked.   
  
"Yes, that's me. And you are?"  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry. I'm Fred, and this is Gunn." She gestured to the man next to him.  
  
"Ah, yes. Wesley told me about you two."   
  
"Didn't I tell you she was a beauty?" Wesley walked in while half supporting a weak   
Cordelia. Angel had her other side.  
  
"What are you guys doing here?" Dawn was the first to speak, and Buffy looked a little  
out of it.  
  
"We'll explain later. Wesley go and help Giles." Wesley nodded and Angel picked up the  
limp Cordelia princess style.  
  
"What's wrong with Cordy?" Xander asked while getting up from his seat.  
  
"Her visions were getting worse. She'll be fine, they just coming a lot closer together then  
normal." He set her down in a chair and kneeled down next to her. "Delia, are you ok?" The only   
answer he got was a grumble from her.  
  
I thought I was going to pass out next, he moved his fingers to her temples and started   
to move them in a circle motion. And the others looked perplexed as well. Since when was he so   
chummy with the Queen C?   
  
He did look very worried and shot a glance over to his friend Gunn. All he did was shrug   
and took the seat next to Cordelia.  
  
"Hold on, why is everyone so chummy wit pompoms over there?" Spike asked.   
  
"Spike do me a favor and shut-up. Which means everyone, no loud noises." He said in   
a hushed voice.  
  
"Cordy doesn't like loud noises after she gets visions. They hurt her head." Fred told all of  
us and we nodded.  
  
"Angel, can we just go home now? I don't wanna be here, I want a nice cup of coffee, sit  
down, besides Dennis could be worried . . . and I miss Lorne, yea that's it." We saw a smile creep its  
way on Angel's face. I was surprised to say the least. Getting any kind of smile was rare. We saw more  
on Angelus's face then we did with Angel.  
  
"I'm sorry princess, but we have to. I'd rather be home to, but we can't let those visions keep  
attacking you." This caught Xanders attention.  
  
"Hold up . . . princess?" Angel turned around and smiled at the confused Xander.   
  
"Yea, it was Doyle's nickname for her. Kinda just stuck after a while."  
  
"Let's not forget about the big green guy, it's his nickname for her too." Gunn said with his  
head leaning on his hangs.  
  
"Then again in that world she really was." Wesley came over and smiled at her.  
  
"Ehh, would you three stop. I swear! First of all Angel I'm fine. Why are you always so   
overprotective of me?" She shook her head.  
  
"I am not."   
  
"Actually big man. . ." Gunn started but then saw the look on Angel's face then burst into  
laughing. The weird thing is it got a small laugh out of Angel.  
  
"Ok, ok. So maybe I am. I just don't want anything to you. Remember what you said? We're  
family, so I guess its my job." She nodded and gave a soft smile.  
  
"That's it! Where are we, in the twilight zone?!?" Everyone looked at Xander.  
  
"No, last time I checked we were fine. How about we get this over with. I wanna get Cordy  
back home." Angel stood up and Cordy followed.  
  
"Yes, please. I want my normal visions. These are just freaking me out! And the pain is way  
worse. Angel are you sure I can't hurt them?" She grabbed his arm and leaned her head on it.  
  
He laughed, again this is not normal. "I'm sure Cordy. Ca'mon, lets get this done so we can  
get back home. If we don't hurry soon I think Dennis is gonna use me for target practice again."  
  
With that we started the spell. Buffy still seemed a little out of it, and Angel hasn't even   
looked in her direction. And from what I see I wasn't the only one that noticed. The way he fuss's over  
her I'd say he was in love with her. Though I'm not sure if he knows it. When our harmless Spike went  
over to greet her, Angel growled at him. Spike said something about fathers being annoying. Angel  
heard this and rolled his eyes. This is not the Angel we knew.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~* Wesley's POV *~  
  
  
We got Cordy into a circle that was surrounded by those of us here. I have a feeling that they  
don't really want us here. Then again not all of us parted on the best of terms. And they still think that   
Cordy is the bitch she was when she left. That right there is not true at all. She's one of the kindest   
people that I know. And she has one of the biggest hearts.  
  
And the way everyone is looking at Angel. I think it's the fact he smiles so much. That mainly   
has to deal with our small family. Of course also with Cordelia, if anything else. Sometimes I think that  
he doesn't even know that he even fell in love with her.   
  
It kinda seems sorta weird to them, as I could imagine. Then again to us, their lives now are   
kinda, as Cordelia would say, twisted. Xander and Anya were planning on getting married, Spike is now  
a good guy, and from what I hear is in love with the slayer. And Buffy's sister Dawn has a crush on him.  
  
However I did feel a little tension between Willow and her girlfriend Tara. I wonder what   
happened to Oz. He was such an interesting person. However not on full moons, those nights I think  
that everyone liked him by himself.  
  
Giles and Willow had taken lead in the spell while everyone else just stands there as a human  
shield, so all people except for Angel are in the circle.  
  
This spell was far more complex then we first thought it would be, first time we tried it, she   
began to thrash around. After that we got Angel to settle her down. So now he is in the middle with her,   
and we did the spell again.   
  
Giles said that this was one of the most longest spells he has ever done. Fred and Gunn looked  
very worried and Angel looked a little worse for ware after it was done. Even after he refused to leave her  
side as she rested. Willow said that her mind needed to gather everything, and the thing that bothered us   
the most is that she slightly changed. Physically that is. Her hair was longer, and it was as black as night.  
  
Her skin tone was also tanner and her features were more fuller. Gunn joked on how many  
more corny jokes Lorne would make once we got home. She also seemed a lot more in shape then she  
was before, meaning that her mussels were more toned and firm. We opened her eyes, glad to see that  
they were still hazel, yet they had also changed a little. It was more of a dark green, it made her eye's   
look a lot darker and mysterious.   
  
We had put Cordelia in the back room, in which was also where Buffy had trained. Right now  
Angel and Gunn are in there with her, while me and Fred look through Gile's books to see if we can find  
anymore information on that Mante demon, and maybe even where Cordelia was from.  
  
(AN- Ok this is where it gets tricky. So listen up. Cordelia is Max, and Max is Cordelia. So if I write   
either of their names, they be the same person.)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~* Max's (aka Cordy) POV *~  
  
Ok, bright light hurt's. Where the hell am I? The last thing I remember was going to Crash's,   
because earlier I went to see Zach off. Then Logan called and told me that Case was found out by the  
remains of Manticore. And if they think that I'm gonna just sit back and watch them try to get my nephew  
they are dead wrong.  
  
"Cordy?" I heard a voice, when I sat up I saw two men were in front of me. I looked around to  
see that I was in a training room.  
  
There was something wrong, I only heard one heartbeat from both of them standing there.  
  
"Who's Cordy? And where the hell am I?" I yelled and they looked at each other.  
  
"You don't remember us?" Great, is this some cosmic joke to play on us? Who's next Alec?  
  
"She won't, not for a couple of days." Now another man walked in. "Wesley and Fred are still  
working on the Tealun demon."  
  
"Why am I so weak? And why do I only hear 2 heartbeats when there's three of you." I shook  
my head.   
  
"What do you mean hear? A human can't hear someone's else heartbeat that far away." The   
man that was sitting next to me said.  
  
"I'm not your average human. Where am I? And who are you?"   
  
"I'm Gunn, one of your friends. And this is Angel and Giles." Here I thought we had weird names.  
  
"Are you kidding me? Gunn, Angel and Giles. Here I thought my home sweet home had some   
wacked ass names."  
  
"Zach doesn't seem so weird, and neither does Max." I felt myself freeze. How did they know  
about him? Or rather me for that matter.  
  
Its times like these you bless Manticore for the weirdness. I'm almost at full strength, even though  
I could still thrown them across the room now, I think I'll stand.  
  
I weren't over to the man known as Gunn and picked him up with my hand. I saw surprise on the  
other men's face and I heard a female voice enter the room.  
  
"Here I thought I was the slayer." I looked over to see a blonde. "Please put him down before I  
have to hurt you." Oh give me a break, that little girl do anything? And what's a slayer.  
  
"Not until I find out where I am, and how you guys know about Zach." I gripped him tighter by his  
shirt and he began to gag.  
  
"I said put him down." She came closer to me and grabbed my arm.  
  
"Fine." Then I turned fast enough as to she couldn't even blink. Now I had her by the hair. "You  
mean like that?"  
  
"Cordelia, unless you wanna be hurting let me go. Since when did you get slayer illusions?"   
  
"Who is this Cordelia girl? And what the fuck is a slayer?" Her eyes widened.  
  
"You don't have your memories?" That's when I let her go.  
  
"Well, considering I don't know you. Take a wild guess. First of all, I don't have any memories  
to lose. I know well of what happened last night. And if anyone here even dared to lay a finger on my baby  
or my coat, there's gonna be hell to pay."  
  
"Baby?" The elder man spoke.  
  
"Yea, my bike. I go nowhere without it, nor the jacket Original gave me for my birthday a while  
back. So where are they."  
  
"Listen to us. You're not who you once where. You are now Cordelia Chase and you're in a   
different dimension. Your name isn't Max, its Cordy." The guy named Angel spoke. It was him as I got  
closer to him, he doesn't have any body heat either.  
  
"What's your deal. No heartbeat and no heat coming from your body."  
  
"You know my deal, you just don't remember. I'm Angel, and we work together. The reason that  
you don't hear my heart is because I don't have a heartbeat. I'm a vampire, however with a soul."  
  
"This isn't real. And the next thing you'll be telling me is that I have some sort of magickal   
powers."  
  
"Well, sorta . . ."   
  
"Ok, that's it. I'm blazing. Bye bye."  
  
"No." What is it with me and blonde's? Well, female blonde's anyway. I never liked them.  
  
"Out of my way, or I'll throw you outta my way." She smiled, that little girl smiled.  
  
"Go ahead and try." Hehe, my fun time.   
  
"Really? I can?" She looked at me as if I was high. "I'll take that as a yes." With that I grabbed   
her and I threw her across to the other side of the room. "Ok, I told ya so. Bye now."  
  
"Entrapa." I heard a red head say. What is it with people coming from outta no where?  
  
"Yea hocas pocas my ass, im out." I couldn't move my feet, they were stuck. "All right twinkle  
fairy, what'd you do?"  
  
"Will, remind me not to tell her to throw me again." The blonde walked over to me. "How did you  
do that?"  
  
"Well, you guys seem to know enough about, and yet you don't know *what* I am. That usually  
is the setback for most bad guys."  
  
"We're not bad guys." Gunn said walking with Angel following.  
  
"Yea, ok. A witch and a vampire. I've seen enough horror flicks." Angel sighed.  
  
"We're telling the truth. You're name is Cordelia. You were reborn into this dimension by a   
demon name Mante."  
  
"Mante? Sounds like the short version of Manticore. *sigh* I'll talk, but only to him." I pointed to   
Angel.   
  
"Why him?" Giles asked.  
  
"I don't know, I go by my feelings, and as weird as this may seem, I trust him. And that there is  
rare, I don't trust many."  
  
He looked at me and smiled. "I guess Cordy is still in there."  
  
"Remember, a couple of days, at the most two weeks, but never longer then that. It depends on  
the amount of memories and if they are tragic enough for them to process at a pace."  
  
"Then it's gonna be two weeks." They all looked at me. "Believe me, my past is not very pretty."  
  
"None of ours is." The blonde said.  
  
"You have no clue what I've gone through. Ever gone through the guilt of killing?" Her eyes went   
wide, as did all the others.  
  
"You . . . killed people?" She asked.  
  
"No, Easter bunnies. Yes, people. Now let me go, I want to find my family before Lydecker finds  
where Case is. I let them take Tinga away from me, I'm not letting them take my nephew." Giles nodded  
the firey red head, and I had control over my feet.  
  
"There's more like you?"   
  
"Yes, and some are like my family. Now thaws all I'm telling you blondie. Nothing personal. I just  
never liked female blonde's. Always were a pain in the ass." I started to walk out when I called for Angel,  
however when I called something else came outta my mouth. "Coming Broody Boy . . . what did I call you?  
I don't know, maybe I'm going crazy."  
  
"No, you usually call me that. That would be a good sign."  
  
"Really why?"  
  
"Cause as you say, I 'brood' a lot."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Hey Angel." Gunn called out. We both stopped and turned around.  
  
"Yea Gunn?" He answered back to him. For some odd reason he was smiling.  
  
"Figured her first memory would be about *you*, I'd hate to be the person to be saying told ya   
so." Angel didn't respond, he just walked ahead of me and I had to follow. Told ya so? About what?  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~* Willow's POV *~  
  
  
Wow, thing's today just seem to get stranger and stranger. And now it seems that Cordelia   
doesn't have her memories of any of us. And I also have to talk with Gunn, what did he mean by 'told you  
so?'  
  
"There is something so strange, how the hell did she throw me like that? To her I wasn't even a  
rag doll, she did it without effort." Buffy said as she walked over to the door.  
  
"Why did she chose to talk only to Angel?" Our watcher seemed very perplexed, myself included  
to the little group.   
  
"That's easy." Gunn said while looking at the weapons that were showing in the case. "Man, I  
gotta show these to Wesley when he's done with the researching. Even Fred would like to look at them."  
  
"How is it 'easy'? Why does she trust him so must so blindly without knowing him?" Buffy asked him.  
  
"That isn't for me to tell, when they get everything together they will. I do know this for certain, Angel  
will make sure he gets his seer back in full force. If it concerns our Cordelia, he'd do anything to make sure  
that she's safe. He's even training her to make sure she's ok while she's at the hotel alone with Fred while  
we go get the bad guys." Wow, I'd say he's in love, just tell Buffy *I* said anything.  
  
Things have changed among everyone, and well I just hope that everyone is ok with all of the changing   
is going on.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
~* Angel's POV *~  
  
  
  
"What was that all about?" I turned to see Cordy, no Max with a confused look.  
  
"What?"   
  
"The 'I told ya so' thing between you and Gunn." God, why is it women always pick up on this things. Never  
any of the other things, just the things that might have to do with emotions. Guess it's a female trait.  
  
"Nothing, maybe I'll tell ya once you get all of your memories back. Why do you trust me? I mean you said  
it yourself, I'm a vampire and you've seen enough movies."  
  
"I didn't really mean it, if everyone believed in movies you'd be running away from me." Ok, what did she  
mean by that?  
  
"Why would I?"  
  
"Since I seem to be in a small group that know about the horrible evils of this world, I thought maybe I  
could let you into some of the 'demons' of my world." No way denying it, this was Cordy, she just grew up different  
then she did here.  
  
"Ok, one thing . . . how did you throw Buffy across the room?"  
  
"Oh that, I'm sorry. I just don't get along with prissy little blonde's. And I know I didn't remember her,  
it's just I know I don't like her for some odd reason." Why would Cordy hate Buffy? Sure they've never gotten  
along very well, but Cordy is usually nice with people.  
  
"No, I mean *how* did you do that."   
  
"Oh, well comes along with what I am. I'm a transgenetic, aka what people call mutants. There have been  
a lot of bad lies now that everyone got out. I know that they deserve to be out of where they were, but now  
they have to live in fear because they look different. Not all of us look human like me. Most of the earlier   
versions, what us later ones call, nomalies look more animal then human. And people are afraid of what they don't   
know."  
  
"You know a lot of them?"  
  
"Of the nomalies?"  
  
"Yea."  
  
"No. Only real early version I know of is Joshua. He's the first, and he's trying to help me find Sandman."  
  
"Who's Sandman? I thought you said there were no demons there."  
  
"No, nothing like that. It's his last name. Joshua calls him father, and in a way he is. He made each of us  
and made us into what those bastards wanted out of us." Sounds like maybe I'm not the only one running from their  
past.  
  
"What are you guys made for, and why so strong?"  
  
"Well, Lydecker once told me and my brother something that always stuck with me. I know it can't be true,   
but sometimes it feels like it." She paused for a moment and sat down on the small wall that lined the playground  
that was deserted this late at night. "He said that we were killers, we lived for the kill. In a way its true. I  
always had to have some sort of adrenaline rush, which started my life as a thief, also because of the pulse.   
And from what I can see here, it never hit here. It was a signal that turned the wealthiest country on the globe  
to a third world country over night. Bank accounts were destroyed, shops corrupted. Everything was gone, and if  
anything I'm glad."  
  
"How could you be glad?"  
  
"You can disappear very easy in the US. Made it even easier for us to escape. By the time I was ten I had  
killed over 30 men. They made a mistake with us, they had given us to much independence. Me and 12 others escaped  
from that hell. They trained us to be soldiers, and we were forced to listen, if we didn't the training would get  
harder and more tougher. I remember how he'd make us stay underwater for longer then we were supposed to. But it  
helped in the long run. If needed I could stay underwater for up to 6 minutes. Maybe they put to much fish DNA without batch.   
Then again maybe we did, considering I hardly sleep."   
  
She caught the confused look I gave her. "Shark, ya know?"  
  
"In your DNA? No one can control that. I could understand the whole trained to kill and all that, me being  
a vampire. The other stuff, doesn't make sense."  
  
"Hmm, and a vamp with a soul does?" She got me there. I just shrugged.  
  
"Good point."  
  
She laughed, and it sounded like she didn't with many people. "We were made, then they paid women to give  
birth to us. I found that out later, but then a little bit after. . . I found out that she wanted me. One of the  
doctors there said that she cried and screamed to keep her baby, me."  
  
"That must have been hard on you."  
  
"Not really. We were raised to be soldiers, to kill coldly, swiftly and quiet. It was weird, I was the only   
one who couldn't stand guns, that was until they recaptured me and I had to deal. So I'm used to them, once again."  
  
"I know that you don't remember any of us, but do know that Wesley, Gunn and Fred care about you, and more   
then anyone I do. You're my best friend, I just hope that you remember soon."  
  
"Good to know. So is there anything that I need to know? Like where I live, and what do I do? Like work."  
  
"Well, you live in an apartment in which you share, however with a ghost, but a good one. That there is a   
very long story. And remember when I said you kinda held magick?"  
  
"Yea . . . what does that have to do with anything?"  
  
"It deals with a lot of things, its the reason you're so important to what we do. You're my seer, the one that  
gets visions about people that need help. You got this power from Doyle died, he kissed you then you got his power  
that is very important. However, I heard that they hurt, and by what I've seen they've been getting worse, the  
pain remains, but you didn't want to tell us."  
  
"Weird, I wonder what my homegirl is doing. I even miss that jerk that likes to pester me."  
  
"What's their names?"   
  
"Who, my homegirl? Or one of the many assholes I have to deal with on an everyday basis?"  
  
"How about both?" She stood up walked in front of me, since I was still sitting.  
  
"Well, my girl's name is Original Cindy. She has to be my best friend ever, then for those so-called males?  
For one Normal, the boss from hell. I swear if he says 'bib bib' one more time, I'm gonna throw him through the   
wall! Then there's Alec, very annoying. And we didn't even meet under the most pleasant places."  
  
"Where?"  
  
"Manticore, he was the DNA twin to my brother, Ben. And no, Alec is not my bro. I even named him, Alec as in  
Smart-aleck. My second chose was dick."   
  
"What?"  
  
"Ah, we didn't get along very well. Considering they tried to make him my mateing partner."  
  
"You're just loosing me. Why did you need a 'mateing partner'?" Who were these people?  
  
"Well, I kinda destroyed the lab, in which had all the embryos, and since they couldn't make any new ones for   
a while they were going to impregnate the females of the camp with the other guys. Of course if you were in the   
same group. Ya know, X-5's with X-5's. He came into my room and first thing he said was for me to take off my   
shirt."  
  
"He just went in and told you that?"  
  
"Yea, then I kicked him back into the door, and told him that was the only kind of touching we'd ever be   
doing ." Oh wow, this girl is pretty funny. I just wish we'd have her back to normal.  
  
"You're a piece of work, you know that?"  
  
"What can I say I'm. . . " She screamed and held her head. She must be having a vision. When it was over she  
caught her breath.   
  
"What'd you see?"  
  
"So that was a vision." She shook her head and stood up. "I saw us, and a bunch of ugly looking dudes. Their  
face was all weird, and they had teeth like a wolf."  
  
"Vampires."  
  
"You don't look like that... " I looked at her then I shifted my face to show her. He tilted her head to the  
side and had the look on her face that just said 'ohhhh.' "Ok, maybe ya do sometimes." I shifted back to normal.  
  
"It's our weapon."  
  
"Yep, I can see that. I thought it was kinda cool. Uhh, behind you." I turned around to see 3 vampires behind  
me. I took out the stake that was in my pocket and I dusted them.  
  
"I think I'm gonna like it here."  
  
With that we went back to get Wesley, Fred and Gunn and go home. Maybe in time, we'll have her back to normal  
but then again, this is the way Cordy should have been. Who knows?  
  
~Fin~ 


End file.
